If then you have been raised with Christ [to a new life, thus sharing His resurrection from the dead], aim at and seek the [rich, eternal treasures] that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. And set your minds and keep them set on what is above (the higher things), not on the things that are on the earth. For [as far as this world is concerned] you have died, and your [new, real] life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, Who is our life, appears, then you also will appear with Him in [the splendor of His] glory. Colossians 3
He has made everything beautiful in its time. He also has planted eternity in men’s hearts and minds [a divinely implanted sense of a purpose working through the ages which nothing under the sun but God alone can satisfy], yet so that men cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end. Ecclesiates 3
Some people store up treasures in their homes here on earth. This is a shortsighted practice—don’t undertake it. Moths and rust will eat up any treasure you may store here. Thieves may break into your homes and steal your precious trinkets. Instead, put up your treasures in heaven where moths do not attack, where rust does not corrode, and where thieves are barred at the door. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6
i haven’t written in a while. haven’t been here in a while. haven’t felt like i have had much to offer. much that I’ve been filled with. much that i have been seeking.
i have, however, been feeling like i haven’t been journeying well. haven’t been seeking well. growing well if at all.
lies that feel more true. knowing what i know that i am never behind in time or with Him, that He doesn’t have expectations for me to meet with a checklist of my progress. knowing that He is not distant with arms crossed waiting for me to get it together and then return for a scolding.
it was good to walk into a weekend where the first night my heart was spoken to that it needed to be reminded, and awakened yet again, for the millionth time (and thank You that there will always be more. infinite do-overs. that i don’t want, but know i will need):
“just come back to Me. re-turn. remember. re-relationship. I have missed you. I am. right here with an arm around you always. whether you feel Me or not.”
and i can breathe.
and say i am sorry. with no scolding. no guilt. just missing and wanting Presence and Life and Love-Knowing and Becoming.
i would love to stop there. but i get to go on. after remembering Home, i am wooed a little deeper:
(pause. if you haven’t read the scripture at the top, now is the time.)
that sense of Home. it is but a sense for now. a taste. of eternity. but to put on the perspective that there is an actual Home… not here on earth. an unknown Home that i am told is the actual truth and my actual destination and citizenship.
my heart and stomach fall. a pit in my stomach. butterflies and not the fun ones.
i am going to die.
this side of life. what i know. all i know. its going to end.
i’m scared and daunted and doubts arise that i don’t live with everyday and surprise me that they are in me.
arise new nature… its time to believe. there is not a lot of time. its time for a new perspective. heavenly and eternal and imperishable. how are you going to live, ashley? this is an unrepeatable gift, this life. this now. its beautiful. i love it. i love celebrating and soaking up every millisecond. but there is more. how are you going to live in and for the more? for that whats-coming. what are you going to dream about-what are you going to goal- that is rooted in eternity? how are you going to live today for those days. how will you treat others and make choices and think and use your time, dear one?
we are told to not think about death and live in the now. that is half true and wildly incomplete. because
I WILL NOT DIE. not really. i have been told i already have. that i should, every day. and that instead of a finale, i am transformed in the blink of an eye. that eternal life is what is more true about me. its been gifted and given. this is not a morbid perspective to wake up with every morning and let that reality sink in. but it is a BIG, out of body, i am so small, this story is SO large, God is God and He is forever, perspective and reality. i am going to go on forever. but much is wrapped up in that. much that i can do today that points to those days.
i’m ready to get started. everyone is saying new year new you. i have heard new year true you. i like that. time to start believing and living from the true me. living fearless. believing all of it. dreaming big rooted in eternity, not just what i want to experience on this side of the veil. storing up treasures. loving with abandon. whatever that looks like. dying everyday. whatever that looks like.
so that i can live never-ending. at Home. with Jesus. Forever.
to becoming Love,
p.s. wild how scripture defends itself and is connected and all tied together, huh?